Seven tips for working with special children

Anxiety, Depression, ADHD, ADD, autism, ODD, borderline. Orthopedagogue Trix van Lieshout and behavioral specialist Anton Horeweg are not in favor of labels. “All these behaviors are actually variants of normal development, in essence they are skill deficits,” says Van Lieshout. “Almost all children, but also adults, have busy, autistic, neurotic and aggressive traits.”

Therefore, do not speak of normality and abnormality, but observe the behavior with curiosity. “A lot of behavior is reactive. Whether children show quiet, dreamy, busy, rebellious or aggressive behavior often depends on the circumstances and sometimes also on a subject or on an unconsciously clumsy approach by a teacher.” A diagnosis can be helpful in guiding a child, but 'disorder thinking' is not. It can lead to self-fulfilling prophecies and prevent someone from working on their behavior themselves: I just have ADHD, there's nothing I can do about that, right? So: “Don't wait for a diagnosis,” says Anton Horeweg. “Even without a label you can think about how you can help him in his development.”

Instead of thinking in terms of diagnoses, it is more useful to look at support needs: what does a child need? You can teach children who have difficulty with impulse control to take a break: Stop-think-act. For example with a color system. A green block on the table means: I am busy. Yellow means: I am struggling with the material. Red indicates: I don't understand, help! Such a system teaches the child to delay his impulses instead of shouting across the classroom. Anton Horeweg: “I often give children who are hampered in their concentration because they are easily distracted or are active, an outlet: just go up and down the stairs ten times.” Investigate the possible cause 'behind the behavior', observe and learn to read the student's behavior.

Sometimes aggressive and unruly behavior hides fear, discouragement and frustration, where understanding is more beneficial than setting a hard limit. This certainly applies to children with a problem on the autistic spectrum, Van Lieshout knows. “They can become extremely angry when confronted with sudden changes. Then the need for support is initially more about removing the underlying fear than about regulating the restless behavior that is a response to the sudden change.”

Discover solutions with the child, Horeweg recommends. “Have a conversation with the child. Children often know exactly what they need. Even preschoolers can indicate what can help a little: I see that you find it difficult to stay focused during math lessons. This is how you fall behind in your work. How can we solve this?" Usually the child is full of good intentions, says Horeweg, who likes to give them the choice of two solutions, for example moving the table out of the group or just taking some exercise.”

When talking to the child, it is important that you ask questions, do not judge and do not give suggestions that push the child towards an explanation. Like: It must be your ADD or ODD. Also involve the parents, say Horeweg and Van Lieshout. Question: Do you recognize this behavior? How do you handle it at home? A joint approach works best and then you are not pitted against each other.” Does the solution not help? Then quickly come back to it in a conversation and let the child tell you what went well and then what didn't go well.

Children who, on average, have more difficulty learning than others often receive a lot of criticism. It is important for them that it is also noticed when things are going well. Give a compliment every now and then: I saw that you were concentrated on your writing assignment. Or: You seemed restless for a moment, but I noticed that you continued independently with the assignment. A compliment makes children grow. Although children with attachment problems or extreme shyness sometimes have difficulty receiving praise. “That gives them such an uncomfortable feeling that it has the opposite effect,” Horeweg knows. “In general, make a compliment small and casual, then most children will get it.”

Always look at what you can do to help students in their development: I see that you are very distracted with a spot that looks out at the window. Let's try what it's like when you sit with your back to the window? Or: What can I do for you to make it easier for you to work concentrated in class? “Focus mainly on environmental factors, because you have influence on them. Leave the child factors, such as a diagnosis, for what they are,” says Van Lieshout. Allowing students to learn through a classmate as a buddy in the classroom sometimes also helps. Try to anticipate situations, Horeweg advises. “For example: everyone is at work, and suddenly I have eye contact with a student. He's watching to see if I'm watching, so he's up to something. Just raising an eyebrow or shaking your head no is sometimes enough to get back to work.”

You're always busy too. And: Are you messing around again! These are comments that arise from a fixed mindset and imply a judgment about the student, according to American professor Carol Dweck. She advises using words that stem from a growth mindset: 'You can already work independently for ten minutes. Let's see if we can make that fifteen minutes.' The words 'already' and 'yet' indicate that you envision growth and imply a positive expectation. Show that you are confident: 'You can't do it yet, but I'm sure you will succeed.' That confirmation is very nice for children, says Horeweg. “They feel supported by an adult who believes in them.” The opposite is also true. If the master used to say that you grew up in front of the gallows and wheels, that often sticks.

“The teacher matters everything,” Van Lieshout emphasizes. “As a teacher you can make education appropriate, more inclusive, with room for children with all kinds of special support needs. You are the key that can make things go better. So invest in the relationship, the most important basic need of every child. The student needs you to develop further. Sometimes there are students for whom things are difficult. Then realize that you are not alone. Be open to your team and ask for help. “Don't think that you will not be considered capable if you share a problem. It is actually a sign of strength if you dare to be vulnerable: How would you approach this? Or: I hear you get along well with this student. Do you have a tip for me? This way you learn to solve problems instead of getting stuck in them.

Do you notice that you have a short fuse with some students? Boiling over faster than you're used to? Then take a moment to consult yourself. “Is the child behaving unpleasantly or is it because you are stressed yourself?” Horeweg: “As a teacher you must have considerable reflective capacity. I constantly make adjustments during the lesson: how can things be improved? And whenever a student exhibits undesirable behavior, keep thinking: what can I do?”